《鸟巢 ——肖凤》 -英语翻译教程-中英双语赏析

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鸟巢 ——肖凤

The Bird’s Nest ——Xiao Feng
 
🔥背景知识:《鸟巢》的作者是女作家肖凤(1937- ),北京人,原名赵凤翔。1959年毕业于北京师范大学中国语言文学系,现为北京广播学院电视系教授。著有《萧红传》、《庐隐传》、《冰心传》以及散文集《韩国之旅》、《肖凤散文选》等。
 
水泥浇筑成的塔楼和板楼,鳞次栉比,远远望去,仿佛是陡峭垂直的群山,构成了大城市的独特风景线。
Rows of cement tower buildings and prefabs, looking from afar like groups of steep mountains, are a unique sight in big cities.
🎈水泥浇成的塔楼和板楼,鳞次栉比译为Rows of cement tower buildings and prefabs,其中用rows或row upon row表达「鳞次栉比」(其意思是一个挨着一个地排列着)。「水泥浇成的」可译为cement或cement-poured。此外,因「水泥」和「混凝土」基本相同,也可用concrete或concrete-poured代替之。又,「板楼」指「预制板房屋」,应译为prefabs,即prefabricated buildings。
🎈远远望去looking from afar
有朋自远方来friends coming from afar

 
然而它们的造型,僵硬呆板,不像大自然的山峦,鬼斧神工,有着美妙的线条,蕴含着迷人的神韵。
They are stiff and stereotyped in form, unlike real mountains which are a masterwork of nature with beautiful lines and implicit enchanting grace.
🎈「它们的造型…」译作They are…in form。有时我们也会用in terms of…
🎈巧夺天工强调人工事物;而鬼斧神工强调大自然的力量。此处将「鬼斧神工」译作a masterwork of nature(大自然的杰作)
 

不过,生活在北京市的平民百姓,如果能够在这灰色的或者绿色的,或者别的什么颜色的高楼里,拥有一个属于自己的空间,不论是大是小,只要它是独立的,能够无拘无束地生活着,也就满足了。
Nevertheless, the common people of Beijing will be content with housing accommodation, big or small, in a high-rise of gray, green or any other color, where they can enjoy the ease and privacy of their own home.
🎈对……(感到)满足be content with
住房housing accommodation
高楼high-rise
🎈「独立的,能够无拘无束地生活着」可按「不受干扰地,自由自在地生活」译为can enjoy the ease and privacy of…,其中privacy作「不受干扰」或「独处」解,ease作「自由自在」解。
 

有时走在马路上,仰首遥望居住的那座楼宇,
Sometimes, while strolling in the street, I raise my head to gaze far ahead at the building where I live.
🎈while strolling in the street :while引导时间状语从句,因为主从句主语一致,且从句谓语中有be动词,故从句省略主语和be动词。
 

找到第17层那几扇属于自己和自己亲人的窗户,就觉得那个叫做“家”的地方,其实更像一个“鸟巢”。
As I identify my window on the 17th floor, I realize what we call our “home” is in fact more like a “bird’s nest.”
🎈所谓的what we call、so-called(个人觉得前者在情感色彩上更为褒义)
🎈我们的地球家园 the planet what we call home
 

因为它方方正正,像一个匣子,虽然它被夹在第 16层与第18层之间,却总是觉得它好像是被高高地吊在半空中,上不着天,下不着地。
It’s cubical like a box. Sandwiched in between the 16th and the 18th floor, it’s like something hanging high up in mid-air, touching neither the sky nor the earth.
🎈「被夹在第 16层与第18层之间」译作Sandwiched in between the 16th and the 18th floor。sandwich简直太形象了。
🎈something的定语都要后置。
 

作为人类的家园,它似乎是太高了一点儿。
Apparently, it’s a bit too high for a human domicile.
🎈「家园」按「住所」之意译作domicile即可。
🎈「它似乎是太高了一点儿」中的「似乎」并非字面意思,而是「显然」之意,译作Apparently。

 
因此常常羡慕鸟儿,它们能够自由自在地飞翔,
Therefore, I often envy birds their ability to fly freely.
🎈jealous和envy
这里只从「褒贬色彩」的角度简单说下。envy相当于中文的羡慕、钦羡,通常是一种良好的心态;jealous则有时是良好的羡慕、钦羡,有时则相当于中文的妒忌,此时就是一种不好的心态。
 

如果它们把巢筑在第17层上面,也能舒展开自己的双翼,款款地飞回去。而且还能站自己的巢里,优哉游哉地鸟瞰人群。
If they had a nest built on the 17th floor of our building, they could also fly back to it light-heartedly and then stand enjoying a leisurely view of crowds milling about in the streets.
🎈「也能舒展开自己的双翼,款款地飞回去」意即「也能轻松愉快地飞回去」,可译为they could also fly back to it light-heartedly。
🎈「还能站在自己的巢里,优哉游哉地鸟瞰人群」译为and then stand enjoying a leisurely view of crowds milling about in the streets,其中milling about in the streets是译文中的添加词,意同strolling in the streets,原文虽无其词而有其意。

 
可是我没有翅膀,如果我要回到自己的“鸟巢”,必须借助楼里的电梯。
But, unfortunately, I have no wings. So I have to use the elevator in the building to get back to my “nest.”
🎈unfortunately和so是增译成分,前者提现作者的心情,后者使句子间衔接更自然。
 

而电梯又受制于电的有无,或有没有故障(它常有故障),以及开电梯的小姐是否坐在岗位上。
And, mind you, that depends upon the uninterrupted supply of electric power, the trouble-free condition of the elevator (which often has troubles) and the presence of the girl elevator operator on duty.
🎈插入语mind you意为(对刚说过的话加以补充,尤使语气减弱)请注意,说实话,是增译成分,强调作者想表达的观点,同时增强与读者的对话感。
🎈后缀-free (与名词连用构成形容词)表示「无…的」「不含…的」
没有故障trouble-free
免税duty-free
不含盐的salt-free
🎈「开电梯的小姐」译作the girl elevator operator,girl意为「女性的」
🎈duty相关表达:
①应尽的义务bounden duty 
萧红《当铺》
本来手就应该给我服务。
It was their bounden duty to wait on me.
②当作…用、用作…的代用品、充当…do duty for
顾均正《耳闻不如一见》
以耳代目。 
Let the ear do duty for the eye.
③尽职、尽本分do one’s duty
④值班,当班on duty
 

不像鸟儿那般自由,一切由它自己做主,想要出门就出门,想要归巢就归巢。
Unlike birds, I can’t always act as I think fit, leaving or coming back to my “nest” freely as I please.
🎈积累「我行我素」类含义的两个惯用表达:(do) as I think fit、do as I please。
 

坐在窗前的写字台前伏案工作,会忽然听见“咕,咕,咕”的悦耳声音,抬头一望,原来是两只白色的鸽子站在窗外的窗沿上,正在亲昵地对话。
Sometimes, sitting at my desk before the window, I will suddenly hear a soft cooing sound and, looking up, I find a pair of white doves billing and cooing on the outer windowsill.
🎈sitting at my desk…和looking up均为伴随状语。
🎈「正在亲昵地对话」未按字面直译为talking together softly(或affectionately),而釆用成语billing and cooing(谈情说爱),取其简洁利落。
 

我不愿惊扰它们,便静静地坐在那里,欣赏它们的漂亮形体与温柔姿态。
Unwilling to alarm them, I will sit quietly admiring their elegant shape and gentle carriage.
🎈此处carriage熟词僻义,并非指马车,而是作不可数名词,指「仪态、姿态」,常用作文学语言。
例句
Her legs were long and fine, her hips slender, her carriage erect.
她长腿细臀,身姿笔直。
 

待它们亲热地谈得够了,就会转过小巧的头颅,用它们那双明亮的小眼睛,与我对视。
At the end of their rendezvous, they will turn their heads and exchange stares with me, their tiny eyes glistening.
🎈「待它们亲热地谈得够了」译为At the end of their rendezvous(或 tryst),取其简洁。未译为After they had finished talking together softly或After they had finished demonstrating their affection等。
🎈their tiny eyes glistening是独立主格结构。
 

每逢这时,我就很想告诉它们,我是多么地喜欢鸽子,毕加索笔下的那只名鸽,其实远不如真实的鸽子美丽。
I will, on such occasions, be very eager to let them know how I love doves and that the famous dove painted by Picasso is far less beautiful than real doves.
🎈「每逢这时」译作on such occasions,积累such的用法。在表示「这样的…、如此…」就可以根据具体语境,选择是否使用such。
🎈is far less beautiful than:far可以修饰比较级,强调程度之甚。也可与其他词语搭配,也是强调程度,表示「远……」,如far beyond my power(远远超出我的能力范围)。

 
我还会产生错觉,不知是这对鸽子还是自己,正住在“鸟巢”里,也不知我与它们是否同类。
I will feel confused as to who should be the real dweller of the “nest” — the pair of doves or me, and whether we are of the same kind.
🎈「产生错觉」按「感到困惑」之意理解译为feel confused。

它们的小脑袋里想些什么,我一无所知,
I don’t know what thoughts they have in their tiny brains.
🎈考虑,想到 have in mind/brains
 

反正是等到它们流连得够了,就展翅飞翔,飞回到属于它们自己的巢里,
Anyway, after enjoying themselves to their heart’s content, they will fly back to the nest of their own.
🎈 anyway是副词,表示「无论如何、不管怎么说」
🎈玩的开心、过的快乐 enjoy oneself
尽情的、心满意足的(do) to one’s heart content 
 

那个鸟巢比我的“鸟巢”平方米略少,不过也是悬在半空,悬在对面那座塔楼的一家住户的阳台上。
It is somewhat smaller than mine by several square meters, but is also hanging in midair, over the balcony of a residence in the opposite tower building.
🎈somewhat作副词,表示「有点儿,有些,有几分」
萧乾《枣核》
有点不好意思looked somewhat ill at ease
夏衍《野草》
也许特殊了一点be somewhat too unusual
 

除了鸽子之外,也有麻雀造访我的窗台。
In addition to doves, sparrows also frequent my windowsill.
🎈frequent my windowsill中frequent作动词,指「常到、常去、常出入于」。并注意,frequent作动词和形容词时的发音不同:The adjective is pronounced /’friːkwənt/. The verb is pronounced /frɪ’kwent/.。
 

或者一只,或者两只,或者更多。它们叽叽喳喳,跳跳蹦蹦,全然不顾有人正从窗户的另一面望着它们,很像一群喜爱游玩的活泼孩子。
They will come singly, in pairs or groups, chirping and hopping about like playful kids, totally impervious to any peeper behind the window.
🎈一只,或者两只,或者更多singly, in pairs or groups
🎈「全然不顾有人正从窗户的另一面望着它们」可译为totally impervious to any onlooker on the other side of the window,现,为了简洁,改译为 totally impervious to any peeper behind the window。积累onlooker和peeper,表示有「在旁观察、窥探的人」
 

它们的家不知筑在何处,好像比鸽子的家距离远些。
The whereabouts of their home is unknown, but apparently it is farther than that of doves.
🎈farther是far的比较级,别眼抽抽看成father(父亲)

 
这些客人光顾我的“鸟巢”,让第17层的高空有了魅力。
The visit of these guests to my “nest” has lent great charm to the 17th floor.
🎈lend…to…
①把…借给
例句
Will you lend me your jacket for a little while?…
你能把上衣借给我穿一会儿吗?
②提供,给予支持
例句
Stipe attended yesterday’s news conference to lend his support.
斯蒂普出席了昨天的新闻发布会以示支持。
③平添,增添,赋予
例句
Enthusiastic applause lent a sense of occasion to the proceedings…
热烈的掌声给活动平添了几分隆重的色彩。
 

有时站在窗户里面向外望去,常常看见鸟儿们在窗外飞翔,这种景象使自己几乎忘记了是被围困在水泥筑成的方格子里。
Often, when I see birds flying beyond my window, I will forget I am living in the prison cell of a cement-poured home.
🎈「这种景象使自己几乎忘记了是被围困在水泥筑成的方格子里」译为I will forget I am living in the prison cell of a cement-poured home,其中the prison cell of a cement-poured home作「像牢房一般的水泥筑成的屋子」
 

可是,只要俯首下望,大城市的单调景色就会一目了然——
But, if I stoop to look down, I’ll see immediately how insipid the city is.
🎈此处stoop为动词,表示「弯腰、俯身」。此外,stoop还可表示「驼背」。
柔石《为奴隶的母亲》
……因为读了书,背有些偻偻的,斯文的模样。
He stoops a little as well-educated men generally do, and he is quite gentlemanly.
 

马路很像一条灰色的带子,
The streets stretch like grey ribbons.
🎈stretch是增译成分,如直接译为look like gray ribbons也可以。
冰心《从重庆到箱根》
嘉陵江犹如银白色的绢带。
The Jialing River looked like a silvery white ribbon.
 

形形色色的汽车和无轨电车像大大小小的甲壳虫,慢慢地向前蠕动,很久才能走到视线之外。
It takes quite a while for cars of all descriptions and trolleybuses to move along slowly like beetles of various sizes until they are out of sight.
🎈形形色色的汽车cars of all descriptions
各式各样的、各种类型的of various descriptions。
其中,description表示「类型」,常用搭配为of some/all/every/various, etc. descriptions 
何为《最后一圈》
芸芸众生human beings of all descriptions
施蛰存《美国的男女》
各色市民people of all descriptions
🎈甲壳虫beetles。
The Beatles(甲壳虫乐队),英国摇滚乐队,由约翰·列侬(John Lennon)、林戈·斯塔尔(Ringo Starr)、保罗·麦卡特尼(Paul McCartney)和乔治·哈里森(George Harrison)四名成员组成。1960年,乐队于英格兰利物浦市成立,其音乐风格源自20世纪50年代的摇滚乐,并开拓了迷幻摇滚、流行摇滚等曲风。
🎈消失在视野中(be/vanish) out of sight 
 

近处是深灰色的屋顶。 远处是层层叠叠的楼群。
Nearer in sight are dull grey rooftops, and farther on stand row upon row of buildings.
🎈译文是倒装结构。其中farther on表示「更远处」
🎈英语中,有些倒装是出于语法上的需要,非用倒装语序不可,具有强制性;有些则是为了达到某种修辞效果,如强调、平衡、衔接等。
🎈一排排、层层叠叠row upon row
 

绿色的树木像珍宝,令人爱不释“目”,使人更加向往大自然。
Green trees are so lovely that we can scarcely take our eyes off them.
🎈so lovely that we can scarcely take our eyes off them是so…that的结构。
🎈自己译时,可以选择译出「使人更加向往大自然」。此处省译是译者结合下文所选择的翻译策略。
 

很想变成一只鸟,从这座“鸟巢”中飞出去,飞到森林中去,飞到大海边去,飞到崇山峻岭中去,飞到一切有花有草有树有水,惟独没有水泥和汽车尾气的地方去。
I wish I could become a bird so that I could fly off from this “nest” to the forest, the sea, the mountain, or to any place with flowers, grass, trees and water, but without cement and tail exhaust.
🎈I wish I could和I wish I can意思均为「我希望我能」。但也有所区别:前者指一般无法实现的愿望;后者指可以实现的愿望。
🎈汽车尾气tail exhaust
 

去享受一下没有污染的清新空气,去享受一下没有噪音的宁静氛围,去享受一下没有撒过漂白粉的清澈溪水,
It would be a place where I could enjoy unpolluted fresh air, quiet atmosphere free from noise-pollution, pure water from a limpid brook.
🎈「没有撒过漂白粉的清澈溪水」可按「未被污染的清澈溪水」译为pure water from a limpid brook。
🎈此句译文:不用 and 的并列,属于不完整列举,还有想表达的内容被略去,意犹未尽,是典型的文学语言。

 
去寻找一个没有是非,没有烦扰,没有摩擦,没有争权夺利,没有勾心斗角,没有尔虞我诈的干净去处。
It would be a clean place without discord, disturbance, friction, scramble for power and gain, intrigue and mutual deception. 
🎈短短一句话中出现了好几个有点眼熟但自己绝对想不起来的词汇:discord、 disturbance、 friction、 scramble、 intrigue、deception。一个字,背。
 
🔥必背词汇
discord        un.不一致,不和,纷争
英义
Discord is disagreement and argument between people
例句
A note of discord surfaced during the proceedings.
事件进程中出现了意见分歧。
 
friction        un.矛盾,不和,争执
英义
If there is friction between people, there is disagreement and argument between them. 
例句
The plan is likely only to aggravate ethnic frictions.
这一方案很有可能只会加剧种族冲突。
 
deception       n.欺骗,受骗
英义
Deception is the act of deceiving someone or the state of being deceived by someone.
例句
He admitted conspiring to obtain property by deception
他承认曾与人合谋骗取财产。
whereabouts      n.(人或物的)行踪,下落,所在之处
英义
If you refer to the whereabouts of a particular person or thing, you mean the place where that person or thing may be found. 
例句
The police are anxious to hear from anyone who may know the whereabouts of the firearms.
警方急盼任何可能知道这批武器下落的人提供线索。
 
impervious        adj.无动于衷的,不受影响的
英义
If you are impervious to someone’s actions, you are not affected or influenced by them.
例句
She seems almost impervious to the criticism from all sides.
对于来自各方的指责,她似乎无动于衷。
 
🔥重点表达
远远望去looking from afar
独特风景线a unique sight
鳞次栉比rows或row upon row
造型僵硬呆板are stiff and stereotyped in form
鬼斧神工a masterwork of nature
对……(感到)满足be content with
住房housing accommodation
高楼high-rise
所谓的what we call、so-called
上不着天,下不着地touching neither the sky nor the earth
被高高地吊在半空中hanging high up in mid-air
被夹在第 16层与第18层之间Sandwiched in between the 16th and the 18th floor
没有故障trouble-free
开电梯的小姐the girl elevator operator
值班,当班on duty
谈情说爱billing and cooing
至于,关于 as to/for
考虑;想到 have in mind/brains
玩的开心、过的快乐 enjoy oneself
尽情的、心满意足的(do) to one’s heart content 
常到、常去、常出入于frequent
一只,或者两只,或者更多singly, in pairs or groups
全然不顾totally impervious to
平添;增添;赋予lend…to…
俯首下望stoop to look down
形形色色的汽车cars of all descriptions
爱不释“目”can scarcely take our eyes off them
汽车尾气tail exhaust
是非discord
烦扰disturbance
摩擦friction
争权夺利scramble for power and gain
勾心斗角intrigue
尔虞我诈mutual deception
 
🔥复盘测试
远远望去
独特风景线
鳞次栉比
造型僵硬呆板
鬼斧神工
对……(感到)满足
住房
高楼
所谓的
上不着天,下不着地
被高高地吊在半空中
被夹在第 16层与第18层之间
没有故障
开电梯的小姐
值班,当班
谈情说爱
至于,关于
考虑;想到
玩的开心、过的快乐
尽情的、心满意足的
常到、常去、常出入于
一只,或者两只,或者更多
全然不顾
平添;增添;赋予
俯首下望
形形色色的汽车
爱不释“目”
汽车尾气
是非
烦扰
摩擦
争权夺利
勾心斗角
尔虞我诈
 
🔥表达对比
「迷人、有吸引力的」有几种表达?
 
绿色的树木(像珍宝),令人爱不释“目”,使人更加向往大自然。
Green trees are so lovely that we can scarcely take our eyes off them.
 
然而它们的造型,僵硬呆板,不像大自然的山峦,鬼斧神工,有着美妙的线条,蕴含着(迷人)的神韵。
They are stiff and stereotyped in form, unlike real mountains which are a masterwork of nature with beautiful lines and implicit enchanting grace.
 
它没有婆娑的姿态,没有屈曲盘旋的虬枝,也许你要说它(不美丽),——如果美是专指“婆娑”或“横斜逸出”之类而言,那么白杨树算不得树中的好女子;
You may call them unattractive because they have neither the graceful carriage of a dancer, nor such branches as can twine and climb.
 
我总觉得她有一本无字的书,书上写满了(令人神往的)故事… 
I always thought her in possession of a wordless book full of fascinating stories.
 
面对着这样庞大而温驯的驮兽,我们不能(不惊异地欣赏)。
These heavily-built, docile pack animals were just amazing and adorable.
 
还有秋雨哩,北方的秋雨,也似乎比南方的下得奇,下得(有味),下得更像样。
As for autumn rains in the North, they also seem to differ from those in the South, being more appealing, more temperate.
 
除了课堂,对我们更(具吸引力)的,是他在海淀住宅的那座客厅。
We found the reception room in his Haidian residence more appealing than the classroom.

未经允许不得转载:帕布莉卡 » 《鸟巢 ——肖凤》 -英语翻译教程-中英双语赏析

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