Winter in White Horse Lake夏丏尊Xia Mianzun🔥背景知识：夏丏尊（1886—1946），浙江上虞县人，我国著名文学家、教育家、出版家，著译颇丰，其作品《文心》、《文章作法》、《平屋杂文》、《爱的教育》等，在20世纪20-40年代的文坛，曾风行一时。1921年，他到家乡上虞白马湖的春晖中学教书，并在学校附近盖平方安家，自题室名为「平屋」。《白马湖之冬》一文是他后来移居上海时所写的名篇，文章回忆旧地故居，蕴含眷眷深情，用语平淡朴素，构思严谨周密。🎈「白马湖」属地名，更具体来说是一个湖的名字。对于地名这一类的翻译通常采用音译（可译为Bai Ma Lake）或意译，这里采用的是后者。在实践中，采用哪种方式主要取决于该地名是否有实际含义、译后是否更符合母语阅读习惯及语境等。一些特别简单或者没有什么特别含义的地名采用音译，比如:甲乙路。而类似「白马湖」本身就有意象且译后也符合目标语人士的习惯，所以英译为White Horse Lake。在我过去四十余年的生中，冬的情味尝得最深刻的，要算十年前移居白马湖的时候了。I am now over forty, but it was not until ten years ago that I got a feel of what winter was really like soon after I had moved my residence to White Horse Lake, a place beyond my home town. 🎈「冬的情味尝得最深刻的」，并没有拘泥于原来固有的句式，英译为I got a feel of what winter was really like…。实则是将原句转换成「令我真正体会冬天的…」，feel这里为名词，应理解为「体验」，这是在充分理解原文的基础上作出的翻译，这点非常值得借鉴。中文的正式文体中时常省略主语，做英译时要找到句中的逻辑主语根据情况补充完整例如本句中的I…🎈「要算…的时候了」用了常见句式It was not until…that…→直到…才🎈「移居」这里并没有单用move一词来表达，一方面moved my residence to更符合原文体行文风格，另一方面考虑到后文所提到的笔者是举家定居在湖的另一面。🎈a place beyond my home town在此处属于增译法的运用，文章的首段第一次出现了「白马湖」这个地方。「移居」一词表明此地并非作者的家乡，a place beyond my home town不仅准确传达了原文的信息，也与下文字里行间流露出对白马湖家乡般的留恋之情有了呼应，不是家乡却胜似家乡，充分体现了作者对家乡的热爱，非常符合上下文。这也是出于让读者更好地理解译文的目的，通过增加原文所没有的句子来进行补充说明，准确的增译会比加译注使得文章更流畅。十年以来，白马湖已成了一个小村落，当我移居的时候还是一片荒野。Since then, however, it has grown into quite a village, but it was an expanse of wilderness at the time when I moved in. Q：「一片荒野」为什么译成an expanse of wilderness？🎈如果只翻译成wilderness很难让人产生「空旷辽远」的感觉，而expanse正好弥补了这一缺失给读者呈现出了「广阔、辽阔」的景象，这就是翻译理论中说的译得充分、译得饱满。春晖中学的新建筑巍然矗立于湖的那一面，湖的这一面的山脚下是小小的几间新平屋，住着我和刘君心如两家。The new buildings of Chun Hui Middle School then stood tall on the other side of the Lake while on this side were several newly-built small one-storey houses tucked away at the foot of a mountain where lived two families separately, the family of mine and that of Liu Xinru.Q：译文中的tucked away该如何理解？🎈译文中的tucked away为增译成分。tuck意指「隐藏在…」，而原文并没有这一文字的表述。译者增加了这一个成分不仅没有破坏原文的表达内容，而是把原文的味道译出来了。因为这一词组的增加更加强调了其四周的僻静及荒无人烟，与原文的抒情基调一致。又，tuck sth away （be tucked away）英义为 if a place is tucked away, it is in a quiet area〔某处所〕隐藏在〔寂静的地方〕。例句The village of Eyam is tucked away behind the hills.伊爱姆村就隐藏在山后。此外两三里内没有人烟。The neighborhood was totally unpopulated far and wide except for the two households.🎈译者选择The neighborhood（这片居住区域）作为主语，紧扣接下来展开的描述。🎈文中所用的「两三里」意在表达「大的范围都很荒凉」，照顾到译入语的表达习惯，这里并没有直接用数字对应翻译为距离范围，而是用更贴切的far and wide。🎈为了充分译出原作者所强调的「没有人烟」，用了totally这个副词来修饰unpopulated（无人居住的）一家人于阴历十一月下旬从热闹的杭州移居这荒凉的山野，宛如投身于极带中。Having moved from Hangzhou to this desolate countryside late in the eleventh moon of the lunar year, we felt like getting bogged down in a polar region.🎈请注意整个英译句式的语法结构Having moved…, …felt like….，对于处理一前一后发生且有因果逻辑关系的长句特别常见。中文句间的逻辑关系多体现在「意」，而英文则多体现在「形」上。🎈「投身于…」根据语境译为getting bogged down in…（深陷于…）体现了译者选词的准确。🎈此外，英语人士对「极地」的印象都是「环境恶劣、艰苦」，译文直接译为polar region也很准确。那里的风，差不多日日有的，呼呼作响，好像虎吼。The wind there blew almost everyday, howling like a tiger’s roaring.🎈各种动物的叫声bee 蜜蜂 buzzbird 鸟 tweetcat 猫 meowhen 母鸡 cluckcow 奶牛 moocuckoo 布谷鸟 cuckoodog 狗 woof duck 鸭子 quackfrog 青蛙 croakhorse 马 neighlion/tiger 狮子 roarpig 猪 oinkraven 鸦 cawturkey 火鸡 gobble屋宇虽系新建，构造却极粗率，风从门窗缝隙中来，分外尖削，把门缝窗隙厚厚地用纸糊了，椽缝中却仍有透入。The new houses were of poor quality, with a biting wind coming in through every chink in the doors and windows. And our efforts to have all the cracks sealed with paper nevertheless failed to stop it from breaking into the house.🎈这一句的译文用了转化法中的概略化的转换（注：其它的转化方式还包括句式结构的转换、文化意象的转换及肯定与否定的转化），原文用了四个小的分句，分别表达了屋子的「新」与「差」和寒风的凛冽，充分体现了中文「竹型句式，平行、松散」的结构特点，而英文是层层剥开的逻辑型，「形（即语法结构）」就体现了非常强的逻辑关系。原文是较平行的短分句，而译文用了两个小句。🎈「风从门窗隙缝中来，分外尖削」意为「凛冽的风从缝隙中吹来」，biting wind简洁生动。其中biting一词传神地表达了风的「尖削」之意，体现了英语简洁性的特点。🎈「粗率」→「粗略草率，不精确，不周到」，描述房屋可译为were of poor quality。风刮得厉害的时候，天未夜就把大门关上，全家吃毕夜饭即睡入被窝里，静听寒风的怒号，湖水的澎湃。When it was very windy, all we could do was shut the front door before dark and go to bed after supper, listening quietly to the whistling of the sharp wind and the surging of the Lake waters.🎈「天未夜」即「天黑之前」，译作before dark。before表示（时间上的）前后的用法非常常见。🎈listening quietly to…作伴随状语。靠山的小后轩，算是我的书斋，在全屋子中风最少的一间，我常把头上的罗宋帽拉得低低地，在洋灯下工作至夜深。松涛如吼，霜月当窗，饥鼠吱吱地在承尘上奔窜。In the small rear-room close to the mountain, which, least affected by the wind, was my study, I often worked by the light of an oil lamp late into the night, with my woolen cap pulled down, while the pines were soughing in the wind, the white moon shining on the window, and hungry rats squeaking and scurrying in the neighborhood of the ceilings.🎈靠山的小后轩，算是我的书斋，在全屋子中风最少的一间译作In the small rear-room close to the mountain, which, least affected by the wind, was my study.此处「在全屋子中风最少的一间」位于句末的位置，而译文却把其作为插入性成分放入了句中，此处属于转换法中的句式结构的转换。读原文可知其强调的是「书房风最少」，作者深刻地意会到了原文作者的用意，因此将其作为插入成分放到了译文中。因为在英文中插入成分是可以起到强调和引起读者注意的功能的，可以说译者用地道的英语很好地表达了原作者的意图，不仅使译文自然流畅而且准确地传达了原作者的用意。🎈当窗→正对着窗户：shining on the window，翻译中对原文的准确理解是基础即便母语也是如此。🎈「饥鼠吱吱地在承尘上奔窜」译作and hungry rats squeaking and scurrying in the neighborhood of the ceilings：此处用了翻译理论中的文化意象的转换。民国时期有些地区没有天花板，房梁横木之上用遮布挡灰，名曰「承尘」，属于我国特有的文化词之一。如果直译恐怕外国人不知所云，译者在这里用了the neighborhood of the ceiling，语义清晰明了。此意象转换也可视为归化法。我于这种时候深感到萧瑟的诗趣，常独自拨划着炉灰，不肯就睡，把自己拟诸山水画中的人物，作种种幽邈的遐想。Seized with a poetic mood generated by the scene of bleakness, I would stay up late and sit alone poking the charcoal fire, imaging myself a figure in a traditional Chinese landscape painting and indulging in deep reveries. 🎈「把自己拟诸山水画中的人物，作种种幽邈的遐想」→「想象自己是山水画中的人物，并沉浸在自己的遐想中」译为imaging myself a figure in a traditional Chinese landscape painting and indulging in deep reveries.现在白马湖到处都是树木了，当时尚一株树木都未种。White Horse Lake is now rich in vegetation while at that time it was totally treeless. Q：此处的「树木」为何译成了vegetation，可以直接用trees吗？🎈此处的 vegetation 指「植被(Plants, trees, and flowers)」是包括树木在内的总称，为概略化的转换；「树木」亦可直译为trees，比如 grown with trees或者covered with trees。作者之所以此处译为vegetation，是在充分理解上下文做出的翻译选择，意在强调此地植被繁盛．有英文散文的韵味。太阳好的时候，只要不刮风，那真和暖得不像冬天。When the sun shone bright on a windless day, it would be nice and warm. 🎈「太阳好的时候，只要不刮风，那真和暖得不像冬天」整合句意为「没有风的日子，阳光是很温暖的」，在翻译实践中重新梳理逻辑、整理句式的能力很重要，此句中的「只要不刮风」译为a windless day，「那真和暖得不像冬天」为it would be nice and warm，而整句为When the sun shone bright on a windless day, it would be nice and warm.就是此种能力的体现。（ps：逐字的对译看似是严格遵守原文，却是最不提倡甚至不负责任的，每一位翻译初学者都应记于心的一条基本原则。）一家人都坐在庭间曝日，甚至于吃午饭也在屋外，像夏天的晚饭一样。The whole family would then sit in the courtyard to bask in the sun, and even have lunch in the open air like we did in summer.🎈「曝日」即「晒太阳」，现译作bask in the sun（沐浴阳光）🎈在户外、露天in the open air例句She gave a free concert in the open air, near the Lincoln memorial.她办了一场免费露天音乐会，就在林肯纪念堂附近。日光晒到哪里，就把椅凳移到哪里，忽然寒风来了，只好逃难似地各自带了椅凳逃入室中，急急把门关上。Where there was sunshine, there we would move our chairs. When the cold wind came, however, we would scamper indoors like refugees, each carrying a chair or stool and hastily closing the doors behind us. 🎈「日光晒到哪里，就把椅凳移到哪里」即「哪里有阳光，我们就把椅子移到那里」译为Where there was sunshine, there we would move our chairs.这个句式类似于Where there’s a will, there’s a way.(有志者事竟成)”。请注意这里「晒」并没有拘泥原文而翻译成相应的动词，取而代之的是更为地道英文中本来就有的句式，这样读起来不仅更原汁原味而且避开了动词直译的处理难度。🎈When the cold wind came, however…中的however是增译成分，提醒读者接下来叙述的事情与之前不同，也从侧面对「日光浴下的惬意」与「避风时的狼狈」两种状态进行对比。又，each carrying a chair or stool and hastily closing the doors behind us是独立主格结构。在平常的日子，风来大概在下午快要傍晚的时候，半夜即息。The wind usually began to howl towards evening and last until midnight. 🎈「风来（towards）」「半夜即停(last until)」这些动作的描述主要通过howl(咆哮，怒吼)来贯穿。至于大风寒，那是整日夜狂吼，要二三日才止的。In the case of a severe storm, it would rage for two to three days and nights on end.🎈on end表示「连续地、不断地」例句He would disappear for weeks on end.他常常是连续几周不见人影。最严寒的几天，泥地看去惨白如水门汀，山色冻得发紫而黯，湖波泛深蓝色。At the height of the bitter cold, the fields would for several days look deathly pale like cement, the mountains would turn dirty purple with cold, and the ripples of the Lake would be of a deep blue.🎈「最严寒的几天」译为At the height of the bitter cold是一个很出彩的表达，bitter cold增加了bitter（刺骨的）一词更充分地表达处于「严寒」的感受，透过文字即可体验到这种刺骨寒意。🎈「惨白如水门汀」译为deathly pale like cement，「水门汀」即「混凝土」，「惨白」即deadly pale，其中deathly(死人一般地)也可换为deadly，ghastly。「水门汀」指水泥，是英语cement的音译。译者在译文中加deathly一词，意思为「死人一般地」，将水泥地的惨白形容得惟妙惟肖，进一步烘托了寒风的凛冽，更加符合原文的韵味。🎈山色冻得发紫而黯→山因寒冷而变为暗紫色，译为the mountains would turn dirty purple with cold；湖波泛深蓝色→湖泊的涟漪呈现出深蓝色，译为the ripples of the Lake would be of a deep blue。下雪原是我所不憎厌的，下雪的日子，室内分外明亮，晚上差不多不用燃灯。I had no aversion to snowfall because it was very much brightened up my room, so much so that I could almost do without lamplight at night. 🎈「晚上差不多不用燃灯」译为I could almost do without lamplight at night，do without意为「没有…也行」，原文可视为否定句，而译文却转换了句式，其中do without是固定词组，意思为「没有…也行」🎈so much…that和so much so that比so…that和so that在语气上更强。例句I was so much tired that I couldn’t walk on.我极度疲倦，走不动了。She is hungry, so much so that she had to go begging.她很饿，饿到不得不去乞讨。远山积雪足供半个月的观看，举头即可从窗中望见。The distant mountains would remain snow-capped for at least half a month — a scene I could easily enjoy from my window.🎈远山积雪足供半个月的观看，举头即可从窗中望见→远山的积雪可持续半个月，这是我一抬头就能看见的风景，译为The distant mountains would remain snow-capped for at least half a month—a scene I could easily enjoy from my window.🎈「举头即可」译为easily(enjoy)，不仅还原了原文的意思，这样译也使得译文更加简洁，作为翻译学习者也应重点学习这种提炼转换的能力。可是究竟是南方，每冬下雪不过一二次。However, it was a pity that, living in the south, we could have snowfall only once or twice each winter.🎈「可是究竟是南方，每冬下雪不过一二次」译However, it was a pity that, living in the south, we could have snowfall only once or twice each winter.译者根据上下文补充主语we，原文逻辑上隐含。🎈「可是究竟」译为however, it was a pity that，加强了惋惜的感情色彩。我在那里所日常领略的冬的情味，几乎都从风来。Hence it was from the wind only that I could in my daily life get a taste of winter. 🎈「领略的冬的情味」译为get a taste of winter，taste在英文中也具有抽象的用法此处就是一个例子，抒情类的文章a taste of…使用较多，意为「领略…（风光）」或者「感受…（情味/风情等）」白马湖的所以多风，可以说有着地理上的原因。White Horse Lake is windy for geographical reasons.🎈「地理上的原因」译为for geographical reasons，很简洁。 那里环湖都是山，而北首却有一个半里阔的空隙，好似故意张了袋口欢迎风来的样子。The place is surrounded by mountains except in the north where there is a gap as wide as one fourth of a kilometer, like the wide open mouth of a bag, ready to accept the wind. 🎈「半里」→250米，译为one fourth of a kilometer。🎈as wide as one fourth of a kilometer作gap的后置定语。白马湖的山水和普通的风景地相差不远，唯有风却与别的地方不同。It is the wind that differentiates White Horse Lake from other scenic spots.🎈此句意为「风是白马湖与其它风景地不同的地方」→风使二者区分开来，用differentiates一词搞定，处理相当灵活，值得学习。🎈本段的主要描述对象是风，所以译者使用了强调句式It is the wind that…展开描述，亦与「唯有风」对应。风的多和大，凡是到过那里的人都知道的。Anybody who has been to the place can tell how frequent and violent the wind is there.🎈「凡是到过那里的人都知道的」即「凡是到过那里的人都能讲出风的多和大」，故选用tell一词。又，风的「多」和「大」，对应使用了frequent和violent描述也很准确和形象。风在冬季的感觉中，自古占着重要的因素，而白马湖的风尤其特别。The wind has, since time immemorial, been an important factor in characterizing winter, particularly so in White Horse Lake.🎈「风在冬季的感觉中, 自古占着重要的因素…」意为「风是凸显冬季特色的一个重要因素」，译为The wind has, since time immemorial, been an important factor in characterizing winter。🎈「而白马湖的风尤其特别」按「白马湖尤为如此」之意译作particularly so in White Horse Lake，相当于（which is） particularly so in White Horse Lake，是补充语，对信息进一步补充说明。其中so意为「(指某一情况)就是这样，事实如此」例句It is strange to think that he held strong views on many things, but it must have been so.现在想来，当时他在许多事情上的观点都非常强硬，真是不可思议——可情况确实如此。particularly so指「尤为如此」例句This autumn, however, it is particularly so. 然而今年秋天更是如此。现在，一家僦居上海多日了，偶然于夜深人静时听到风声，大家就要提起白马湖来，说“白马湖不知今夜又刮得怎样厉害哩！”Now it is quite a few days since I and my family moved to Shanghai. Whenever the wind blows in the stillness of the night, we will all mention White Horse Lake, saying, “White Horse Lake must be terribly windy tonight!”🎈「白马湖不知今夜又刮得怎样厉害哩！」意即「白马湖今夜想必又刮大风了」，译为White Horse Lake must be terribly windy tonight！原文中用了「不知」二字，表面上是对白马湖刮风的猜测，但实际上作者是想表达「白马湖今夜想必又刮大风了」之意。译者用must be这一词组对其进行了肯定的猜测，不仅表达了其言外之意，呈现出作者对白马湖非常之了解，同时流露出了作者对白马湖的思念之情。🔥必背词汇snow-capped adj.山顶积雪的英义A snow-capped mountain is covered with snow at the top.例句the snow-capped Himalayan peaks覆盖着皑皑白雪的喜马拉雅山峰bog down v.使拖延，使停滞不前英义If a plan or process bogs down or if something bogs it down, it is delayed and no progress is made.例句The talks have bogged down over the issue of military reform.谈判在军队改革问题上陷入了僵局。howl v.风呼啸，怒号英义When the wind howls, it blows hard and makes a loud noise.例句The wind howled all night, but I slept a little.风整夜怒号着，但我还是睡了一会儿。chink cn.裂缝，裂痕，裂纹英义A chink in a surface is a very narrow crack or opening in it.例句He peered through a chink in the curtains.他透过帘子之间的缝隙偷看。seal v.封住，粘住(信封)英义When you seal an envelope, you close it by folding part of it over and sticking it down, so that it cannot be opened without being torn.例句He sealed the envelope and put on a stamp.他封住信封并贴上一张邮票。charcoal un.木炭，(用于绘画的)炭笔，木炭条英义Charcoal is a black substance obtained by burning wood without much air. It can be burned as a fuel, and small sticks of it are used for drawing with.例句We cooked our food over burning charcoal.我们在燃烧着的木炭上烹煮食物。reverie cn.幻想，白日梦英义A reverie is a state of imagining or thinking about pleasant things, as if you are dreaming.例句The announcer’s voice brought Holden out of his reverie.播音员的声音将霍尔登从幻想中惊醒。scamper v.步子小而轻地奔跑，疾走，蹦蹦跳跳英义When people or small animals scamper somewhere, they move there quickly with small, light steps.例句Children scampered off the yellow school bus and into the playground.孩子们欢快地跑下黄色的校车，冲进运动场。ripple cn.波纹，涟漪，细浪英义Ripples are little waves on the surface of water caused by the wind or by something moving in or on the water.例句It’s a ripple in the fabric of space and time.它是时空中的涟漪。aversion n.厌恶，讨厌，反感英义If you have an aversion to someone or something, you dislike them very much.例句Many people have a natural and emotional aversion to insects.很多人生来讨厌昆虫。🔥重点表达…之冬 Winter in…冬的情味 what Winter was（体验）最深刻 was really like移居 had moved my residence to已成为… has grown into…一片荒野 an expanse of wilderness移居 moved in 巍然矗立于 stood tall on…平屋 one-storey houses 没有人烟 totally unpopulated far and wide荒凉的山野 desolate countryside阴历… of the lunar year…的下旬 late…虎吼 howling like a tiger’s roaring粗率 of poor quality尖削 biting wind椽缝 cracks寒风的怒号 the whistling of the sharp wind湖水的澎湃 the surging of the Lake waters书斋 study罗宋帽 woolen cap松涛如吼 the pines were soughing in the wind霜月当窗 the white moon shining on the window承尘 the neighborhood of the ceiling诗趣 poetic mood山水画 traditional Chinese landscape painting幽邈的遐想 indulging in deep reveries到处都是… be rich in… （树木）都未种 be totally treeless 只要不刮风 a windless day那真和暖得不像冬天 it would be nice and warm曝日 bask in the sun把门关上closing the doors behind us风来 The wind began to howl towards…最严寒的 At the height of the bitter cold水门汀cement不用… could do without…积雪 snow-capped举头即可 easily （enjoy）可是究竟 However领略的冬的情味 get a taste of winter…的情味 a taste of…地理上的原因 for geographical reasons唯有风 It is the wind that…风的多和大how frequent and violent the wind is there自古以来 since time immemorial僦居 moved to…刮（风） blows夜深人静 the stillness of the night🔥复盘测试…之冬 冬的情味（体验）最深刻移居已成为… 一片荒野巍然矗立于平屋 没有人烟荒凉的山野 阴历… …的下旬 虎吼粗率尖削椽缝寒风的怒号湖水的澎湃书斋 罗宋帽 松涛如吼 霜月当窗 承尘 诗趣 山水画 幽邈的遐想到处都是… （树木）都未种 只要不刮风 那真和暖得不像冬天曝日 把门关上风来最严寒的水门汀僦居 刮（风） 夜深人静 🔥表达对比「到处是」有几种说法？现在白马湖（到处都是）树木了，当时尚一株树木都未种。White Horse Lake is now rich in vegetation while at that time it was totally treeless.红堡里（到处是）各种眼线。The Red Keep is full of eyes.看看这屋子里——（到处是）垃圾！And look at this room — garbage all over the place!然而，他身边（到处是）丘陵。Yet everywhere around him there were hills.
帕布莉卡
朗读这篇文章
爱是一颗心遇到另一颗心（出处+配图） 
